I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
