Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
