Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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