so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
