Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
