We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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