...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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