guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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