i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
