Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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