didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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