Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
