; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Randomize
