doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
