try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
