I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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