Dual....:-)
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize
