I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
