There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
