And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
