So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Just invented taco cereal.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
