So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize