I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I think my fart just growled at me.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
