Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
