that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
