You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
