Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
