so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I got inside last night via doggy door
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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