He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize