Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(518): View more from New York

Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved

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(314): View more from Missouri

So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?

(816): View more from Missouri

Most never. Some around 65.

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(818): View more from California

Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.

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(951): View more from California

Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries

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(419): View more from Ohio

I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you

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(785): View more from Kansas

Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??

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(440): View more from Ohio

We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch

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(516): View more from New York

Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet

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