Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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