Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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