Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
