Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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