You work out of a Hotel?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
