sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize