JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
