I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
