just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
