I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
