He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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