Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
