You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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