Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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