She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Randomize
