areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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