Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize