Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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