U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
