I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize