so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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