What did we do last night that was yellow?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
As shirtless as possible
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
